Wednesday, April 14, 2010
I've changed..
0 
I miss the old me. I really do, I miss my confidence, I miss my laughter, I miss the way how little things inspire me, I miss how the wind blew my hair back, I miss the way I used to smile, I miss the way people used to think of me, I miss the way I never lied, I miss my innocence. Really, I miss everything of the past. When I was thirteen and the bus driver missed the bus stop that I was supposed to get off at even though I pressed the button I cried. I really did, cause I was scared, I didn't know where I was. I know what you're thinking "thats pathetic." But you've got to understand I didn't catch the bus to school back then, my parents were kind of overprotective they would send me to school everyday, accompany me. So yeah..thats my life. I miss Sydney, I miss Australia, I miss Yeonjae, Patricia, Madeleine, Anieszka, Eve, Penny and more. I really do miss them, I miss how they never lied or backstabbed. I like the way we just talked like normal people but here? I can't even differentiate friends from foe's. We all lie. We all laugh together. We all are so fake. Its killing me, killing as in hurting me and making me laugh ironically. Perhaps I'm like Holden from Catcher in the Rye.
When this one person departed from my life, my whole world tore apart.
I just want to go back to Australia. I miss the air, the places, the things way go, the hopes the dreams the inspiration there. The inspiration here just kills the me.
Its so ugly, its so awful looking but something attracts me, it makes me want to be there, exploring this place knowing what is happening what is behind those windows, what is behind those doors.
Just live on?
Nights.